Happy

I am happy. Really truly happy. At peace.

call me crazy

but I am thinking about getting The Biggest Loser game for the Wii. I thought it would be something fun for Erin and I to do together. We can even challenge each other. She doesn't need to lose any weight, but I've noticed that her stamina isn't so great. Plus it would be fun for us. She seems pretty interested in it. We don't have the fitness board, but it says you don't have to have it. What do you think?

Try ..try...try again! Right? I'm back on the wagon. I'm not drinking anymore soda and I'm going to really pay attention to what I'm eating and when. I've got to get this under control now!

La

She called tonight, it was late but i had been awake shortly before. it was almost three a.m. and she texted

that something unspeakably horrible had happened.

I have known this girl, this little China-pet as I call her, for some time now. We worked together. When she started dating him, I knew it was a fling. It was something she was doing because she is young- he is inappropriate, but temporary, and I felt she was entitled to her youth.

She is out of his league, looks-wise, too pretty and young, socio-economically from a stable family who sent her to private highschool and now she's an art major at the best school in my hometown.

I didn't like her at first, something about her was off-puttingly intense. She seemed to stare at me from kohl-rimmed deep-set blue eyes.

But that was so long ago now.
She won me over. She tried and that was enough for me. It is much too hard for me to actively dislike someone. It isn't in my nature and she is wonderful. she is my own personal Alice from Wonderland.

oh, the many silly games we play. and the many truths we tell, the nonsense we smoke, and the hope and faith we share.

He beat the shit out of her tonight.

By friday, I'll have his head on a plate.

Dinners this Week

last night: Arugula and Steak Salad + Eggplant Stir-fry by Chris
tonight: pizza! prosciutto and arugula
tomorrow: mustard chicken+ broccoli
mango chicken tacos, tuna farfalle and shrimp arrabiata to follow.

For my next menu: i need your most favorite CHEAP dinner recipes.

much obliged to you,
e

mathological

hello, dahlings!
wondering if you could do me a favor.
I have estimated, and proven now three times, that I spend about 25 dollars/per day for groceries, not including any alcohol- but all breakfasts, lunches and dinners included.

today I shopped for 6 days and spent $155. I want to see if my bill is really so very high, compared to you guys who, they would say, live in more affordable areas than Boston.

For six-seven days I seem to always spend $30 on produce.

k, what about you all?
love.

there's somethin' happenin' here

I have not fully committed myself to better eating. Having visitors seems to make that task even more difficult. I am thinking about healthy eating/living more. I find myself choosing not to have ice cream or ordering water instead of coke. These are not big things, but they are a start. I'm looking forward to David's schedule change and the changes that will mean. He'll be home in the evening so dinner will be more thought out. With just Erin and I there was a tendency to throw something together at the last minute. He won't be coming home at the insane hour of 2a.m. anymore which means my sleep habits will change drastically. This is the part I'm most excited about! I know that sleep is the key to so many health issues. My hope is that life will begin to take on some form of regularity and that it will translate to better eating habits. If nothing else, he won't be home for breakfast anymore which will mean I'm far less likely to make pancakes, french toast, or waffles.
Something I find interesting is that my weight has not fluctuated since a few weeks after having Hayden. I did initially drop a few lbs while in the hospital, but those came back. I didn't even lose any weight while in the hospital for OHS or the week long ordeal with pericarditis. Nor did I gain any after surgery which was a huge surprise to me considering all of the restrictions I had. Throughout this time I haven't really watched what I was eating that much. If I wanted something I ate it. During the time between Hayden's birth and the surgery I stress ate a lot, but I stopped that after surgery. The only modification to my diet was lowering sodium, but I'm not a big salt eater anyway so I'm not sure that was much of a change. One thing I do consume more of these days is Coke. Other than that I find that I don't over eat but I do eat what I feel like having. It's just crazy to me that all of this eating with no exercising hasn't equaled weight gain.

I've been a little out of the loop lately, since Mark's kidney stone attack on Friday night. I have felt like I was in another world being in and out of the hospital, up all night several nights with him and trying to get some sleep during the day. It really messed up what Em and I had going. I did get the South Beach diet book and read through it quickly. I decided it was just too much for me to put on Emily all at once so I did make some adjustments to her diet. We have been cutting out carbs here and there and add some extra protein. She has not complained one little bit so far. We have been a little off track for the past few days but I will get back into the groove soon. I've been walking regularly since our weather has been so nice. Seth wants to get a treadmill for this winter, we'll see if we can work that into our budget. I have talked with a personal trainer friend of mine about Emily but so far he has been of little help. I understand nutrition as well as he does. Mark and I have talked about toning beds.

So,we are making progress, little bitty steps in the right direction. Now, if we can just see results from it.